Extraordinarily confusing times
There must be something in the water here, because my peers and I have caught a bug: suddenly we are confused about what our futures hold and what our tasks in the great challenge of life are. Some might say such confusion is characteristic of our age, but I tend to think that the confluence of events occurring in the world around us has created a "perfect storm" of doubt and uncertainty unique to my generation. And this realization has bred utter confusion and the need for a reevaluation of our futures. Once in a lifetime?
People always asked me why I decided to go to Yeshiva for the year, and before I arrived in Israel I never really had good answers. To learn Jewish texts, well sure, that was an integral part of it, but I guess I could have learned anywhere in the world for the year. So when asked, I kept falling back on the good 'ole "It's a once in a lifetime experience" line. It was great: a taut one-liner that somehow convinced most people that I knew why I wanted to go to Israel. In hindsight, that platitude was only a self-justification, a way to convince myself that I was making the right choice. Once in a lifetime experience--big deal, there are a lot of things that I might only have the chance to do once, but I don't put off college to do them. But off I went, and now here I am, four months in and having a great time. Am I glad I came? No doubt about it. Do I know, in hindsight, what are the "real reasons" to spend the year learning in a yeshiva in Israel? Maybe not 100%, but I think I'm getting there. |
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