Army Life: Golani soldiers get hot girlfriends?

I've been wanting to post about this one guy in my unit and his girlfriend for, oh I don't know, maybe about four months now. Forever ago we were on a bus heading to a different base to do some training, and he used my cell phone to access an Israeli version of MySpace or Facebook. He wanted to show me pictures of his girlfriend. "OK," I thought. "This'll be interesting."

Now, this guy is very nice. He's quiet and kind and well-behaved. He temper doesn't flare over every little thing, and he knows how to talk to people calmly. In short, he's basically un-Israeli. He's a good seed. However, his beauty is, how would you say, found on the inside. Don't get me wrong, he's not ugly by any means. I've seen him shirtless, and he may not be Brad Pitt, but he's in shape. He's an average-looking person.

So when he loaded up the photo album of his girlfriend, I was expecting an average-looking girl. It would be fair to say that I was speechless when I was shown about 50 pictures of a drop-dead gorgeous female. She's probably about 5'8, dark skin and dark brown, curly hair, a cute little nose that sits perfectly between tastefully prominent cheekbones. He showed me some bikini shots (relax), and this girl is fit! She not only has a beautiful face, but she also has an athlete's body.

Quintessential 'Sephardi-Jewish chick' Miri Bohadana,
a famous Israeli model/actress/beauty queen.
She is not dating a Golani soldier.
PHOTO: Israel Celebrity Source

My speechlessness turned into suspicion. I asked him if he was rich, or if maybe she was crazy, and even if he was lying. I apologized for my insolence, but I told him that this girl was out of both our leagues, combined. He swore that she was his real-life girlfriend, and that he could prove it. He went to another album, and there were all the cheesy, corny, bf/gf pictures that 18 year olds take. Hugging, cuddling, kissing, etc.

I secretly harbored the notion that she could be a hired model, or maybe a slightly morally-debased cousin. He put all the suspicions to rest, however, when he recently showed me some more shall -we-say risqué pictures. Nothing too serious, of course, but no cousin outside of West Virginia or Kentucky would be caught in a photo like that. And if she's a hired model, well, he really knows how to keep up an act.

So, the real impetus for this post came just this morning when another guy showed me pictures of his girlfriend. This guy is nice and all, but he's a major mooch sometimes, yells like everyone else over every little thing, and simply isn't the angel that our first example is. Looks-wise, he's just normal. He's definitely not fat now, but he was, and he's by no means the type to envy. He's just average, or even a little less... (not trying to be mean here, just making a point).

OK, his girlfriend is pretty much a model too. She's actually pretty similar in that she's dark-skinned with dark, curly hair. I guess I can't really describe a face that well, but let's just imagine a Sephardi Jewish chick that you'd easily introduce to your uber-critical friends with pride. And did I harbor suspicion? No, I didn't. By now I've just kinda grown used to Israeli girls having bad taste.

But honestly, can someone help me figure this out? I know Israeli guys are totally into blondes, mainly because that is more of a rarity here, but are dark-skinned, dark curly haired girls so abundant that even the gorgeous ones are stuck with mediocre partners? If that is the case, which I'm seriously entertaining the thought of, why haven't I met any on a personal level? Not that I'm looking, and not that I'm immodestly comparing myself to these two guys (I am), but come on, at least let me encounter this apparently bottomless pit of dark Jewish girls.

I think that Israeli girls are just better looking than Israeli guys. Or these guys are really good liars.